First of all, I'm sorry I didn't comment a little sooner, I haven't had much chance over the last few days. Here I am, though.
It sound good, is easier to read. Flows very nicely, too. The jumps in time are easier to follow.
I really like the emotion in this chapter, especially at the end. I can really feel Seraih's despair, and Ronon's helplessness.
Okay, time for questions, some probably asked before, and still unanswered:
Why did the Wraith attack Mira, and what or who were they looking for? Was it Michael that led the attack? Why?
What happened to Seraih's people? Are they still alive, or did they all get killed? If they are alive, where are they?
What is going to happen to Seraih? Will she stay on Atlantis, or will she want to go somewhere else?
And what about her apparent mental abilities? I'm interested to know the extent of her abilities and what she can or can't do. What will the IOA do, if they choose to involve themselves?
How is Teyla? I don't remember you mentioning her except for what happened on the planet. Is she okay?
I hope I'm not overwhelming you with questions. :)
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Date: 2008-08-11 03:42 am (UTC)It sound good, is easier to read. Flows very nicely, too. The jumps in time are easier to follow.
I really like the emotion in this chapter, especially at the end. I can really feel Seraih's despair, and Ronon's helplessness.
Okay, time for questions, some probably asked before, and still unanswered:
Why did the Wraith attack Mira, and what or who were they looking for? Was it Michael that led the attack? Why?
What happened to Seraih's people? Are they still alive, or did they all get killed? If they are alive, where are they?
What is going to happen to Seraih? Will she stay on Atlantis, or will she want to go somewhere else?
And what about her apparent mental abilities? I'm interested to know the extent of her abilities and what she can or can't do. What will the IOA do, if they choose to involve themselves?
How is Teyla? I don't remember you mentioning her except for what happened on the planet. Is she okay?
I hope I'm not overwhelming you with questions. :)
Good luck!!!!